Salvation: Reckless Desires (Blue Moon Saloon Book 4) Read online

  One broad hand tugged gently on the back of her neck, pulling her into a kiss. The other slid from her waist to her rear and pressed down.

  She sighed into the kiss and split into a straddle. His cock twitched under her, and she sat up over him.

  “Mmm,” she murmured, flipping her hair back. She put her hands on his chest and started sliding over him in long, languorous strokes. Up then down, nestling closer each time until she was dragging herself over his cock.

  She murmured her pleasure and closed her eyes, relishing the feel of him under her. Then she reared back and watched his eyes as she slowly slid down over his cock, taking him deep.

  Fill me, she nearly cried. Fill the emptiness inside. Fill it with your heat.

  Todd wrapped his hands around her waist and pulled her closer. She rolled her hips, taking him deeper.

  Fill me like no man ever has before, she wanted to say. He already had, but she was greedy for more.

  When he bucked up, she gasped. She leaned farther and farther back, working him deeper, cartwheeling her arms back to grip his thighs. She rode him, totally and utterly exposed. Her breasts bounced, her hair swayed, and the looks Todd gave her made her feel beautiful instead of self-conscious. She rocked harder and harder, losing her breath. Hissing as he stretched her, gasping when he slid against exactly the right spot. Every sharp thrust of his hips seared her inner walls.

  He teased her nipples and kneaded her breasts, finding out what drove her wild. Every touch pushed her closer and closer to the edge — but then he’d back off, refusing to let her come.

  “Please…please…” She found herself begging.

  Her breasts felt tiny in his huge hands but delightfully sensitive to the callused pads of his fingers. And when he snaked his left hand down to stroke her clit, she had to bite her lip to keep from crying out.

  “Yes… yes…” She moaned as she rode him, faster and faster, desperate for more. Thank goodness for the noise drifting up from the bar.

  She was close. So amazingly close, yet release kept evading her.

  “Todd,” she moaned, hovering between ecstasy and frustration. Something was missing. Something she couldn’t put her finger on. The angle was perfect. His touch, just right. But something—

  His hands tightened suddenly, and he rolled them both, coming out on top. And the second she was on her back, he slammed down with his full weight, pushing deep, deep inside her.

  Yes was what she wanted to cry, but it came out all garbled and low.

  She echoed his movements with desperate pushes on his ass while squeezing with her inner muscles, determined to make it as good for him as it was for her.

  With a low grunt, Todd increased the pace. His chest was right over hers, and his chin jutted as he chased the high they both sought.

  Then her orgasm hit her, and she just about howled. Every muscle in her body flexed, and Todd groaned, too. He powered through two more thrusts, and then he came, too, shuddering and burning inside her.

  He lowered his body and whispered in her ear as aftershocks of pleasure hit her body, one by one. Was he telling her to be quieter? That she was beautiful? That he’d never had a woman like her before? Whatever the words were, they were soft and sweet, and her soul seemed to understand perfectly, even though her brain couldn’t quite make out the individual sounds.

  Todd nuzzled while he whispered. At first, she thought it was just a nice cover-up for the awkward task of wiping them both off with his T-shirt, but it went on much longer than that. He started by nuzzling around her right cheek, and when she expected him to break away, he switched to the other side and went on. And on and on. When she managed to coax her blissed-out mind back into gear, it occurred to her that he was going about it in a systematic way, working from low to high and right to left until every square inch of her skin was pink and glowing.

  “You trying to shed a second skin off on me?” She giggled as he worked his way down her neck.

  “Something like that,” he murmured, scraping his stubble along her collarbone.

  It felt so good, she closed her eyes and hummed. But then her legs got dangerously close to wrapping around him again, and he slowly eased away from her to stand. Behind him, the stars of the Great Bear glittered even brighter than before.

  “Come on,” he said, pulling her to her feet.

  “Whoa.” She grabbed his arms for balance. “Wait, I kind of like it up here on the deck.”

  He wrapped her tightly in his arms, and she could feel his cock harden against her side. “I like it too much. Come on. Let’s go to bed.”

  Chapter Eleven

  “So, you and Anna, huh?” Soren raised his eyebrows.

  Todd growled at his cousin. Never mind that Soren was handing him a coffee and muffin like every other morning. Never mind that any shifter in a five-mile radius could smell Anna’s scent on him. He really, really wasn’t ready to discuss it.

  Todd took a bite of his muffin and spoke through the crumbs. “None of your business.”

  “True.” Soren nodded thoughtfully, then scratched his chest. “But you still have to tell her, you know. Or were you thinking this is just a short-term thing?”

  His bear nearly roared out loud, and his canines extended from his gums in the most blatant challenge he’d ever pulled to Soren’s higher rank.

  “Not a short-term thing,” he growled.

  “Yeah, I figured as much,” Soren murmured.

  “You figured what?”

  “I figured fate brought you here for something other than fixing up the bar,” he mused, watching the steam rising from his mug.

  Todd stared. “You figured? And you were going to tell me — when?”

  Soren just shrugged. “Gotta figure it out yourself. That’s the way it is with fate.”

  Fate. A four-letter word as far as he was concerned.

  Soren motioned toward the café with his mug. Anna was in there, helping Jessica with the morning shift.

  “You have to tell her. You have to explain about who we are. What we are. What it means for her.”

  He’d have told Soren to take a hike if it weren’t for the fact that he’d given his cousin the same lecture years ago when the tables were turned. And Christ, it had taken ages for Soren to finally tell Sarah.

  Todd slumped over the table they sat at in the closed saloon. Yes, Anna was his mate. Yes, she was amazing. And yes, he could barely stand letting her step out of his sight this morning. That part was easy to understand.

  The hard part was being honest — not just about being a shifter, but about other things, too. Like the truth about Teddy. So far, he hadn’t told Anna because it wasn’t the kind of thing you blurted out to a perfect stranger. By the way, let me tell you the long, sad story about how I came to be the father of a child I will never be able to call my own. You just didn’t do that kind of thing.

  But a woman you were serious enough about to want forever with had to know that kind of thing. And crap — things had moved so quickly between them that he hadn’t really had a chance to explain. He really ought to have told her before last night.

  “I know I have to tell her,” he said. “The question is how.”

  And that was just one part of it. The other was the even bigger picture. He still couldn’t figure out whether fate was actually giving him a choice or just fucking with him again.

  A choice. His bear nodded firmly.

  Fucking with me, his human side said.

  “And what about…” he started, then trailed off.

  “What about what?” Soren asked.

  He shook his head. No, he wasn’t going to say the next part aloud. But he sure as hell couldn’t help thinking it. Maybe Anna was better off without him. Humans didn’t spend a lifetime longing for their mates the way shifters did. Sure, humans fell in love, but they fell out just as easily. Even if she was okay with the bear part — and Christ, how would he ever explain that? — and even if she agreed to be his mate, she’d be stuck forever w
ith a bear who was all scarred up. He could hardly hear—

  Can hear her perfectly, his bear cut in.

  Sure, he heard her. But that was about all he heard. He’d nearly gotten run over by a car the other day, and the driver had shaken a fist at him like he was some kind of idiot not to get out of the way. That’s what she’d be stuck with. A half-deaf guy with a half-functioning hand.

  She sure didn’t seem to mind last night.

  He scowled. It wasn’t about making her feel good—

  It isn’t?

  He rolled his eyes, but his bear persisted. Like Uncle Connor used to say. Love is making your mate happy, because that makes you happy, too.

  Todd sighed. He was pretty sure Uncle Connor hadn’t been talking about sex.

  We can make her happy in lots of other ways, too.

  The problem was, he’d bet lots of guys could make her happy.

  Who? his bear demanded. Someone like that ass, Jeff?

  No, like any one of the half-dozen guys who eyed her closely whenever she walked by. Who wouldn’t look? The way she moved, the way she spoke. The way her eyes smiled into you like you were someone special and not just anyone—

  Maybe she just does that for us.

  Todd shook his head. There had to be at least four guys hanging out in the café right now, shooting Anna smiles and chatting her up every chance they got. A constant stream of wolf shifters rotated through the café since Ty Hawthorne had stepped up the watch system — ostensibly to keep an eye on things. But Todd knew that most of those guys took that to mean keeping a close eye on the women — especially the unmated ones. And there were all those overfriendly human customers, too.

  “Man, don’t make the mistake I did,” Soren said.

  He looked up warily.

  “Don’t let your mate go.” Soren’s face grew somber. “I nearly lost Sarah.” His voice was low and gritty. “I nearly lost everything.”

  I already have lost everything, Todd wanted to say.

  He crumpled up his napkin and stood. That morning, he’d woken up feeling like he could leap over the saloon in a single bound. Now, he felt creaky and spent. Recognizing his mate was easy. Knowing what to do about it was the hard part.

  “Where you going?” Soren arched an eyebrow.

  Where else? He pointed toward the back room. Maybe an hour of sanding would help him figure something out.

  Soren shook his head and took the last sip of his coffee, then stood. “Not today. Jessica and Sarah really want the garage finished. We need to clear the last of the junk out.”

  “Now?”

  Soren shrugged and headed out. “The baby’s napping. No better time.”

  Such a simple statement, yet one that prompted such a heavy feeling of loss. Todd scowled as he followed Soren out the back. He was just a puppet in fate’s hands. A tool. Why would he ever drag Anna into a life as messed up as that?

  “All this crap has to go,” Soren said, motioning toward the heap in the garage.

  Todd wondered if it was time for him to go, too.

  Gotta stay. Gotta keep our mate safe.

  “We’re only keeping the useful stuff,” Soren went on.

  He nodded quietly. Yeah, he got the message. Right now, he was useful. But as soon as they tracked down that rogue wolf and ensured the clan’s safety, he’d be superfluous, too. Just like the dusty black-and-white TV set he carried on the first trip over to Soren’s truck or the boxes of old magazines. They’d had their day to shine. Now they were faded and worn.

  A lot like him.

  “On three,” Soren said, and they both lifted a steel workbench covered in cobwebs. There was a lot of sawdust, too, and the smell transported him to the mill at home.

  Home. Maybe he would head back to Montana, after all. He could go back to bear form and live in a den, or he could fix up a cabin somewhere way out in the woods.

  Not going anywhere without Anna, his bear growled.

  “I can’t understand what the previous owners ever did with all this stuff,” Soren sighed. There were empty jars, snowshoes, and even a set of golf clubs.

  Todd eyed the clutter. Yeah, there was a lesson in that. Whatever he decided to do, he’d keep it simple.

  A vision flashed before his eyes: him, sitting on the porch of a painfully empty cabin, stroking a long, gray beard. Jesus, he’d turn into one of those loony hermits the mountains were full of.

  Just talk to her, his bear said.

  Soren pulled one of the golf clubs out and swung it like a bat. “Maybe we should keep one of these around. Keep the troublemakers away.” Then he laughed and stuck it in the back of the pickup. “Of course, bear claws work pretty well for that, too.”

  Todd flexed his right hand involuntarily. Yeah, bear claws were good if they worked, but he wasn’t sure he could extend his.

  Soren’s head snapped right, and he jogged over to the saloon. Either the baby had just woken up, or the phone was ringing. Whatever it was, Todd hadn’t heard it. He itched to pull out the glass jars and throw them against the wall one by one. Instead, he settled for slamming a rusty old rake into the back of the pickup. Then he looked around for something else to smash, bend, or break, but all he found was an old Formica countertop. He was just thumping it into the truck when Soren came out with Teddy in his arms.

  When Soren stepped close, Teddy reached a hand out to grab Todd’s ear, and he froze. His son, reaching out to him? For him?

  The baby stopped short and grabbed Soren’s beard instead.

  “Little rug rat,” Soren murmured, nuzzling the baby with his chin.

  Todd dropped his gaze. Yeah, he got the picture, all right. An idyllic father-son relationship he played no part in. All he could do was ruin it.

  “You mind if we finish up later?” Soren asked, turning away. “Little guy’s hungry. Gotta go find Mommy. Right, Teddy?”

  Todd watched them go, aching inside. No, he’d never be a part of that baby’s life. But he couldn’t just walk away, either. He needed the baby to know he cared.

  His eyes rose to the deck on the second floor. Whatever happened, he needed Anna to know he cared about her, too. He tapped his fingers against his thigh. Laying the Astroturf had been step one of a bigger plan. It was time for step two.

  And step three, his bear murmured, adding a dozen new ideas to the plan. And four and five and six.

  He hesitated, but his bear was adamant. Come on. Go get her. What do we have to lose?

  How about the last remaining bit of his pride? The last vestiges of honor? The tiny kernel of hope she’d planted in his heart?

  You saying she’s not worth it? his bear goaded.

  He growled under his breath. He’d risk anything for her.

  Then do it. Hurry up already.

  Two seconds later, he was heading for the back door of the café.

  Chapter Twelve

  Anna had skipped coffee that morning, because she was already running on an energy kick of the very best kind. Even the hours she spent on her feet waitressing didn’t wipe the stupid grin off her face.

  She hadn’t actually walked into the café that morning announcing, Wow, what a night, but she knew it had to be written all over her face. The others were kind enough not to say anything, although she did catch the occasional knowing smile.

  Yep. I did it, she wanted to say. I finally slept with the man I’ve been obsessing about.

  Of course, having spent the night with Todd only made her obsess even more, because she was dying to see him again. To make an excuse to cross paths with him and maybe sneak in a secret kiss.

  Or two. Or three. Or ten.

  She almost wished someone would come out and ask her about her night so she could say it out loud. Something like, Yes, I really did strip naked on the deck last night. Yes, it was incredible. And yes, he’s as sweet and generous a lover as I thought he would be.

  Nobody asked, so she didn’t get to sing Todd’s praises, but she did hum as she moved.

  You k
now what the best part was? She cued her imaginary audience to ask and immediately filled in the answer. This morning.

  She’d been snoozing in that deeply satisfied state only a woman who’d orgasmed multiple times in a few short hours could. She barely stirred when Todd woke, but she still remembered it all. He’d kissed her on the forehead and murmured something she didn’t quite catch, though it made her grin. He stood at the doorway watching her for a long time before he left, and though she hadn’t been able to keep her eyes open the whole time, she could feel him there. Watching. Protecting. Dreaming of what might be.

  God, she wanted more mornings like that. Mornings that spelled out the definition of serene. The peace and quiet stayed with her even when the café bustled with action. Some customers were worried, others just hurried. She wanted to laugh and tell them to slow down.

  “Can I get a refill, please?” a customer asked, prodding her back into action.

  “I got it,” Janna said, already coming her way with a steaming pot of coffee. “Can you get that?”

  The phone in the back of the café was ringing, and she grabbed it after the fourth or fifth ring.

  “Quarter Moon Café. Hello?”

  Too late, it seemed. The line went dead.

  She was just turning back to the café when the back door opened. A bolt of sunlight streamed into the kitchen, backlighting a man.

  Her heart leaped. Actually, her legs did, too, and before she could think, she’d dashed across the kitchen, into Todd’s arms, and straight into a kiss.

  A kiss that was a taste of heaven, what with the golden light filling the space around him and around her soul.

  “Hey,” she whispered when she finally mustered enough control to pull back an inch. She meant to pull back a whole foot to a more chaste position, but that much control was a little too much to ask for just then.

  “Hey,” he whispered. A tiny smile played around his lips, but his eyes were worried. Why?

  “You good?” She tilted her head to one side, studying his face.

  He combed her hair back with his fingers. “Good.” He nodded. “But I need your help.”